(S)haking (M)y (H)ead

June has not been a great month.  Since earlier in the year I've gained 27lbs according to the scale at the clinic this past Saturday.  I'm miserable on top of the already miserable I was before.

I saw a new rheumatologist last week who also doesn't want to diagnose lupus until more labs tell him what he wants so he's referred me to the Mayo or Cleveland Clinics so they could do the work for him.  Until I see them or the original new rheumatologist my restina specialist wanted me to see (who is also booked throughout the next year) I am just having to suffer through the flares with no help and endure monthly Avastin shots to the eye (aka eye chemo.)  It's so frustrating because I do not have the time or money to get those shots every 4-6 weeks ($50 per visit, on a Thursday afternoon and have to be off work the day after.)  It's no wonder I can't save up vacation time.

Which also bites because we're planning to take a week long beach vacation next June.  For now I can only take one day at a time.

One thing that all the dr's have pointed out (and I know this but when you're in the middle of a flare with a swollen eyeball it's hard to do,) is I need to get back to exercising.  Weightloss would help these symptoms ease off some.

When I finally had some freetime at the desk today I printed out a 2016-2017 calendar and divided out phases and broke down the weight I need to lose into 10% incremental phases.

Phase 1 (June 20 to August 31, 2016) need to lose 25 pounds
Phase 2 (Sept 1-November 30, 2016) need to lose 22 pounds
Phase 3 (Dec 1, 2016-February 28, 2017) need to lose 20 pounds
Phase 4 (March 1-June 3, 2017) need to lose 18 pounds

Does that seem doable?

Let me know and talk to you later.

Dust Off & Try Again

Boy is this quote right. 

Yesterday I didn’t go home and fix my chicken.  I went through McDonalds.  That’s the sucky thing about working an hour from home; it’s getting from work to home that it’s hardest to fight cravings/hunger/exhaustion. 

Not to mention by the time I get home I’m exhausted and just want to crash on the couch in front of the TV. 

But like the quote says, don’t give up; try again. We all make mistakes.  But for now I’ve got to focus on not screwing up otherwise I won’t be healthy enough to enjoy the beach come June 2017 or our next cruise in March 2018.

The next picture for the Summer Shrink Photo Challenge is goals:

I drafted those at the beginning of the year.  They still stand except for the half marathon.  It's been edited back to 5K distance given my loss of fitness and health issues.  

I know this is short and sweet but the point is clear.  Talk to you later.

It Should Be All About the Food Today--Should

Tuesday…at least it’s not Monday.

Started off this morning by finding out the second opinion rheumatologist my retina specialist wanted to refer me to is booked until Feb/March 2017…which obviously doesn’t work for me, or them.  Awaiting a call back to see his second option for the second opinion.

Have stuck to calorie range so far today—the following puts me at 1280 calories, 143 carbs, 44 fat, and 62 sugars according to My Fitness Pal:

Breakfast:  2 Jimmy Dean muffin frittata’s & Starbucks mocha K-pod w/ French vanilla creamer.

Lunch:  Hormel spaghetti and yellow corn.

Dinner:  Baked BBQ chicken tenderloin and macaroni & cheese

Snacks: dill pickle chips & pepperoni beef jerky mini stick

Tuesdays on Shrink Me Fresh are Meal Plan of the Week and/or Recipe of the Day.

Tonight’s dinner recipe is an easy one; I’m brushing chicken tenderloins with some Sweet Baby Rays’ Honey BBQ sauce and baking at 400 degrees for 50-60 minutes while I do some light cleaning and then shower. I’m pairing that with a microwavable side of Kraft macaroni & cheese.  I know, I know, not the healthiest but it’s the quickest and most filling for tonight. 

As for the rest of the week my meal plan is shaping up like this—

Breakfasts Mini frittata’s or breakfast burrito w/ coffee

Lunches Microwavable soup w/ crackers, micro pasta and side of veggies, or leftovers

Dinners Wed Rice w/ veggies Thurs Subway Fri Salisbury steak Sat & Sun BBQ beef & Out (we will eat out one night and the other I will slow cook a BBQ roast.)

Snacks Pickles, apples, popcorn, spicy guacamole & tortilla chips

Next week I hope to have way better planned out menus like normal.  This past weekend I dealt with a flare of whatever is going on so I was like a walking zombie. 

Also, I hope to start back exercising this week.  If only getting my daily steps in in front of the TV.  Currently binge watching on season four of Pretty Little Liars. 

Until tomorrow, talk to you later.

Making Myself a Memory

Hope you've had a blessed Memorial Day and long weekend. I am thankful for those that gave their life to serve this country and award us the freedoms that so many are taking for granted these days.  

First off, last Thursday I had a follow up with my retina specialist.  For the past year I've been battling optic neuritis which turned into a CRVO (eye blood clot) causing blindness in my central left vision.  Over the past two weeks I'd thought I noticed another blind spot and sure enough, there was plus more severe swelling in the eye than originally in the beginning.  My RS had sent me to a rheumatologist back in February to check for lupus...she just wrote me off because my labs didn't have high enough numbers for her (anyone that knows anything about or has researched lupus knows that labs are only one part of the criteria.) 

So he is sending me for a second opinion--yeah, the dr is sending me for a second opinion--because he says there IS something else going on, that 30 year olds don't have this 60 year old problem for no reason.  So I'm awaiting a call with my new appointment.

Also, we think I've been in a flare this weekend/past week.  The heat has made it that much more difficult.  Especially since this weekend I talked my husband into finally going away for the weekend.  I just had to get away for a night.  We went to Pigeon Forge, TN.  Checked out the Titanic Museum (history lovers,) ate at Margaritaville (his first time, my second--first was in Grand Turk,) and he relaxed in the hot tub at the room--the heat from it made me sick.  The AC is my only complaint about the room otherwise it was perfect for a great price.

Anyway, onto my first Monday blog of Shrink Me Fresh.  This past Friday, I weighed in and measured to kick off this summer challenge.  Here are the stats:

Weight to lose:  67 pounds (I'm just not comfortable putting my weight number yet.)
Chest:  49"
Waist: 50"
Hips: 55"
R Thigh: 23"
R Arm: 12.5"

And two days early on the photo challenge, my BEFORE picture (edited from mine and hubs' Titanic portrait--)

Sorry the quality isn't great but you get the idea. And my hair isn't that short, I just had it wrapped around a headband which resulted later in some gorgeous heatless curls.

Since today is Monday on the blog it's Workout of the Day--

Since I'm just getting back into things and since I'm dealing with a flare up of whatever is going on today's workout is some light yoga moves to help stretch out sore muscles.

Later today I will be cleaning some in the house, especially cleaning out the fridge.  Then before the day is out I need to make a grocery run.  Hubs has been telling me we need to start eating Paleo.  Shew, chips aren't included on that meal plan and they're my weakness I have to work on putting behind me.  

Until then, remember those that died for this country today so you can have the day off to BBQ.  Talk to you later.

A Little (er, Long) Backtrack

I wasn’t always fat/overweight/obese, what-have-you.  When I was a child I was actually underweight and a very picky eater plus hyper. In sixth grade I actually put on 10lbs because the “perfect weight” at the time was 115lbs and I was 105lbs.  Puberty made me uneven plus home issues and the new things we call the Internet and BAM! I discovered eating disorders.

Long (bad) story short, I thought I could starve myself to death.  It started at 10 years old but didn’t come to light really until 12.  By eighth grade/age 14 I was also bulimic.  I was in the process of recovering through therapy when my grandfather was diagnosed with cancer my senior year of high school. One of his joys was food; I brought him whatever he wanted and I ate too. By the time I graduated high school I had put on about 20lbs putting me up to about 150lbs.

My first semester of college was marred by more family crisis.  I remember mid-semester weighing in at 163lbs and thinking, “I cannot gain anymore.”  By the time I graduated college in 2008 and married in June 2008 I was 193lbs.

This is where I stop listing numbers.  Yes, I hit 200.  Yes, I went over 200.  In this last year I’ve put on 10lbs alone from giving up and overeating/comfort/binge eating. 

I started Weight Watchers at Work in September 2015.  It was still the Points Plus program and I got off to a good start dropping 9lbs in a few weeks (I was forbidden medically to exercise after an eye blood clot condition.) Then in November they changed to the Smart Points program…I continued trying to stick with WW until March 2016 in which I lost nothing and actually gained back 3lbs on the new program, went on my first cruise and first vacation in 20 years and lost that 3lbs on the cruise, so when I got back I dropped the program. 

I went from then to this past Tuesday without weighing…I really didn’t like the number.  Not only that but I can tell the difference it’s making in my body.  

I’ve always been active and moving; since 2012 I’ve loved doing 5K races and had started to train for a half marathon until the eye condition.  But in the past few months it’s getting painful to walk.  I’m so ashamed to admit that.  It doesn’t matter what shoes I wear—sandals, heels, sneakers, the bottoms of my feet (especially up under my toes) hurt, sting, and develop big blisters.  I’ve gotten stiffer and just feel heavy all over.

I have to make a change if I want to live. I can’t go on down this path.  Talk to you later.

Summer Shrink Challenge for June & July 2016

Issue--have gained 20lbs in the past year as opposed to losing the 80+ I need/needed to.

Solution--start fresh; new plan.

Plan--see below:

Summer Shrink Challenge—June/July 2016

Goals:

1)     Stay in calorie range.

2)   Workout 30+ minutes 5 days per week.

3)   Track exercise/food on My Fitness Pal.

4)   30 minutes Me-Time each day.

5)    Measure/Weigh in on Friday mornings.

Dailies:

*June Summer Shrink Photo Challenge—each day

*Blog once a week at www.shrinklilli.blogspot.com  

Monday—Workout of the Day

Tuesday—Meal plan/recipe of the Day

Wednesday—Motivation/Support of the Day

Thursday—Health tip for the Week

Friday—Fess Up Accountability for the Week

June 2016 Summer Shrink PHOTO Challenge
Day—June	Task	Completed
1	Before Picture--
2	Goals--
3	Workout Shoes--
4	H2O--
5	Inspiration--
6	Cardio--
7	Lunch--
8	Stretching--
9	Music--
10	Protein--
11	Outside--
12	Rest--
13	Motivation--
14	Snack--
15	Plank--
16	Strength--
17	Breakfast--
18	Smoothie--
19	Veggies--
20	Yoga--
21	Sweating--
22	Dinner--
23	Weights--
24	Flexing--
25	Recipe--
26	Dessert--
27	Workout Buddy--
28	Healthy--
29	Green--
30	After Picture--

 That's the plan.  Take one day at a time.  Talk to you later.